This could be a little messy...
I love Cedar City. I love it so much. I am so incredibly sick of this school though. There are only a few friends who are actually keeping me here next semester...well and the location. I have fallen in love with this area. I actually LIKE the cold sometimes.. miracle I know. I also really REALLY like my new apartment. It's so homey and nice...I seriously could stay there all day.
So, this past week was Thanksgiving (and my birthday!). I honestly love Thanksgiving with all of my heart. It was off this year though...the vibe was very different. It was weird without my mom and Allie there and this was the first year it wasn't held in my own house. This year everyone stayed either at Grandmas house or at Erin's new apartment. I miss having my own space in St. George...I didn't think that it would make me so sad to not have the house there anymore... My home is officially Cedar now. I drove by my house while I was in town and lets just say it was ...emotional to say the least. I have always known that the house meant a lot to me but I never took time too appreciate everything it offered to me. I miss it. I also miss my cat. Dumb I know but...I miss him a lot. I feel like everything is changing so rapidly I can't ever keep up with any of it. There is just too much to comprehend at a time.
I am so ready for the next phase of my life it's getting a little ridiculous. Weather it is marriage, a career, or simply living somewhere new I am ready for it. I feel so stuck these days. And don't get me wrong...I love Cedar. But I'm ready to progress.
I miss my cello like crazy but I can't bring myslef to play. I feel like I can't face the fact that I don't love it as much as I would like to. I need to get involved in lessons or something...I just don't know what.
And one last thought...Marriage works. It has to. Without it being true nothing I believe in the world matters.
